Thursday, March 09, 2006

international beat that bitch in your office day

this is pretty much inspired by yoda's comment over the past few days and the fact that i realised that no one really take me seriously even if i post something serious like international women's day and after that swearing preaching and lying preach post as well i guess. since that is the case, i see no harm in me for posting any damn thing under the sun and moon as i will get the same response or non at all for that matter.

so today i present you international beat that bitch in your office day.

before you start beating that bitch you call wife or mother beside you, there are some laws relating to this special day. sanction by the UN under the closed eyes of kopi adnan and bery much oppose by the USA, primarily talk queen herself, fat ass bitch oprah, there are certain rules that need to followed.

1st of all if you notice is call beat that bitch, this is singular, meaning you can only beat one single bitch in your office, not 2 not 3, not the whole gang, just 1, so you have to pick your bitch smartly.
secondly is beat that bitch in your office, not your house, not in the car, not in the carpark, supermarket, whorehouse, policestation, it has to be in a office. i know, i know, you work at home, that dont count. tak kira ok. it has to be in a building/premise, else thats just violence. we dont condone senseless beating of bitches in ducky, and neither do we support domestic violence ok. remember ducky for women's international day.
thirdly, if you have a small company/enterprise/sole propreitor and its just you and the bitch staff of your, forfeit/chup, cannot pukul, remember i say you must choose wisely, there is no one to choose from, so also cancelled.
fourthy, if the bitch you so picked is your wife/bitch or mother/bitch in law, preet ! preet ! off side ! you cannot curi ayam like that, remember ducky do not support domestic violence. but for consolation if its your girlfriend, then you can beat the crap out of her lah for fucking with your father, brother, friend, priest, boss, or whatever lah. but if you are engage but not register yet, still can whack kau her, but if register, sorry.
fifth, i say beat not bitch about it. you can whack kau her till her low mou cannot recognise her but you cannot, cannot insult/swear/curse at her at all. the only way the women's ngo agreed to this day was on this condition. beat yes but you cant swear. so remember while you are beating the crap out of the bitch you cant go like that "you like that bitch, pow! how's that feel cocksucker, pow! wow!...."
sixth, you cannot force fornicate this bitch, even if you beat her senseless already, i know you want to decorate her face with your artwork, but rules are rules, you have to keep your brother in tact. also no bOObs gropping. nothing sexual in nature.
seventh, you cannot kill her or crippled her, injury is understandable, stiches are ok, even a broken arm or leg, but not permanent.
eight, are weapons allowed ? this is the grey area of the act. it mentioned here as non-life-threatening weapon. wtf is a non-life-threatening weapon ? a vibrator ? as i say this is a grey area, so use your unsupervise imagination. yoda would understand this perfectly, staple, keyboard, monitor, puncher, ashtray, toilet bowl, toilet bowl cover, toilet bowl cover ? yes you put the bitch head on the toilet bowl and you slam the mother fucker toilet bowl cover on her head.
ninth, this is not an excuse for you and your bitches to start an office orgy, i didnt say international fuck those bitches in your office day, thats tommorow.
tenth, another condition by the women's ngo, you cannot tie her up and and beat the shit out of her, neither can you you gang up against her, its one vs one. just like street fighter.

now that you know the rules, go ahead, go enjoy your international beat that bitch in your offce day.

did i mentioned that the bitch can fight back, using whaever necessary force required, and somemore she gang-up against you, use destructible weapons and even fornicate you. no-ah ? too bad.

6 comments:

Yodaddy said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
ducky said...

wtf yoda, first u discriminate women by stapling them to the floor, then now you're yoda for women's right. wtf you running for president kah ? i know you "help" three chicks today.
the first one , you open the door, and at the same time stand beside the door, so she have to squeeze her self through you at the same time squeeezing her 36DD pass you.
the 2nd one, you fix the computer, i think this is that girl that you threw the monitor on her head, so this is just trying to pull the monitor out of her head.
and lastly, you bought breakfast for the ah soh, in exchange for a bj. think i dun know you. only ah soh was willing to swallow, since she has no taste bud anymore and being blind and cripple and all.

Anonymous said...

ROTFLMAO!!!

duck, high-5!!

yoda, ah buey ciak...lu ki si ai chia wa??

ducky said...

apparently yoda you did not read the fine print on today's international day event, you have to choose your bitch wisely, and only whack kau one bitch only, further you are not allowed to force feed anything especially from your 1cm longer than mine thingy. you seem to have contravene article 5(d), subsection 6, para II(e) of the international beat women's day by law. for this you have been blacklisted, and no further queries will be entertain from you. if you wish to appeal on this matter you can do so by presenting your case to the international beat women tribunal in Vladisvostok, Russia.

ducky said...

since there is a lack of interest in reading sick humour, i might as well tutup kedai lah. yoda is going to post one more entry tommorow, and if there is no response, then ducky & co. understand lah, no need to merajuk, no need to ta fei kei, just have a brief funeral and then stop blogging and continue my other hobbies, download porn and tiu ppl in ps2. bye.

Anonymous said...

maybe ppl sked to comment cos u all so violent?

yoda, i seriously think u shud start a hate blog or something!! if not, wasted oni yr 'skills'.

duck, mai aneh khuan lar...sure got ppl read wan...just they dun komen...

and mana itu tak boleh dielak??